Back to Goffman’s dramaturgical approach – I came across it again in Steve Wheeler’s blog post which refers to Goffman while trying to discuss the issues of personal space and place in the context of online learning/teaching experience.  According to Wheeler, there is a relationship between the self-presentation and how we perceive space and place. In order to perform well in the theatre of life/work and take the stage by storm, we need a well-defined role that suits us, our personality and skills, a script and an array of props. If any of these is missing, we might lose the sense of space which, in turn, might negatively affect our performance. For example, when I go and teach (face-to-face), I am aware of my role (and strangely enough confidence takes over my normal shyness), I’ve got my lesson plan and a stack of worksheets, sometimes an audio or a video, an internet-enabled computer and so on. Sometimes I divert from the prescribed course of action, especially if I see affordances for exploring other topics or if technology doesn’t work but with years of experience such emergencies become part of the role, sudden prop-lessness or script-lessness become part and parcel of the role and if they shake up my sense of space, it is only for a split second. Wheeler stresses the importance of continuity as a prerequisite for the sense of space and place and he claims that even nomads recreate this continuity be means of travelling with familiar objects that help them tame any new place they decide to settle down in. This resonates with me a lot – having been on the go for the last 6 years, I’ve managed to re-establish my sense of space across countries and cities with a handful of faithful objects: my fav music tunes, books, laptop and a camera.

However, how does this translate into learning online? In my previous real-time online sessions (video chat or text chat via Skype, Elluminate or WiZiQ) I was aware of the role (a teacher learning how to use technology), the props (familiar software) and the script (agenda was always provided). The same referred to the discussion forums: all the weekly tasks were clearly spelt out with questions to consider although we were always welcome to raise any other issues too. So, clearly something familiar-looking (in terms of a syllabus and objectives for the whole course and each of the weeks), safe and secure (closed moodle environment), cosy (8 people and a tutor), structured, focused on process but actually outcome oriented – a journey from A to B, from knowing little about using technology in language teaching to facilitating a fully-fledged online class on story-telling or a longer-term project on collaborative report writing. I enjoyed those course and when creating my first online course and the second I replicated those patterns as it is how things are in education, aren’t they? and everybody expects them to be like this, right? (I’m making assertions on purpose)

Now I come to do this course and most things seem to be subverted or somehow stirred or unsettled:

• what is my role? yes, I am a student but fascinating as the content is, I’m often unsure how I am going to use it my professional context; come on, is this all applicable, replicable?
• what are my props? WebCT looks similar to the familiar Moodle but not the same, I find it quite clunky. The blog got deserted and swapped for the wiki at some point for similar reasons.
• what is my script? Apart from the list of readings and some guidance on what to focus on, the students are given pretty much a free hand in raising questions on the forums ... and there are so many people and so many tutors that ... I’m losing my sense of space and place and I escape. There is little structure to lean on and let’s face it I love structures and patterns and getting from A to B – my previous MA dissertation was on generative-transformational grammar and I loved drawing tree structures for sentences and tracing down movements in deep structure! And my doodling is always in form of lines forming multiple squares and rectangles ....

.... but at the same time I like organic forms too, wandering aimlessly, free improvised jazz and impressionist pictures and the dusk when the day is almost finished but not yet, sort of liminal, transitional ...

What I am trying to say is that there is dualism in me. Part of me loves the course for the challenge it presents – the readings raise interesting questions about education, learning and teaching, undermine my own perceptions and beliefs and introduce other ways of seeing, reconfiguring me as a learner and an educator – Cousin (2005:119) says after Davis (1998) and McLuhan (1964) that with technological inventions ‘we partially reconstruct the self and its world, creating new opportunities (and new traps) for thought, perception and social experience.’

Part of me dislikes it, because I feel deprived of my props and scripts and struggle to find my place and space. I also think and am puzzled as to how to implement what I am learning in my context, how to introduce activities that would encourage smooth learning when I have fixed course objectives and assessment (very much all about ticking the boxes and discrete items). The issue of assessment which is inherent in HE also poses some questions. It seems it is not only students that are led to explore the troublesome but also the tutors might experience the same – if liminal spaces are associated with intellectual uncertainty beyond the black and white of right and wrong – the foundations of the assessment have to be reconfigured too and encompass the spectrum of greys between and betwixt (something you Clara referred to in your recent presentation).